Well after a great and very enjoyable 1st test we find ourselves in Adelaide for the 2nd test (I of course am still in Llandudno, N. Wales where currently we have a blanket of snow outside and the temperature is about -2!)
England are riding high after a record breaking second innings of 517/1, 517/1, 517/1…nope, it doesn’t matter how many time I say it, I still struggle to believe it happened, although Strauss’ pointless declaration only helped punter go and crack a needless 50 and give him a little juice coming in to Adelaide (not that a man with an average of nearly 55 needs it!)
Just before I start an update on me, I still have a headache due to the concussion from last week but am definitely on the mend, also I had Pizza and salad for dinner so no need for snacky time, I just have painkillers and a pint of diet Pepsi.
11.30pm: Ponting has won the toss and decided to bat, we could be here for some time!
11.50pm: I turn TMSofa on ready and turn Sky Sports down (if you haven’t tried Test Match Sofa yet, just give it an hour, if you love it, tell them I referred you)
00.00am: 1st ball is delivered by Jimmy.
00.02am: Katich has been run out after Twatto made him go for a non-run, Trott lined it up and scored a direct hit, he never even faced a ball, so if golden duck means out first delivery, what is out without facing a ball?
00.03am: Wikipedia (which is never wrong!) say…
A duck when dismissed without facing a ball. e.g. run out without facing or stumped off a wide on the first ball faced.
…I’m not convinced but will go with it for now.
00.05am: Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah, Ponting edges a perfect ball from Jimmy to Swann at second slip, now that is called a golden duck (don’t need Wiki for that!) Aus 0/2
00.08am: Clarke scores a run – I’m actually disappointed that we didn’t take another wicket, here’s a stat, 4 Australian’s have faced a ball in their first over of a test match!
00.14am: Not disappointed now, Clarke copies Ponting and edges Jimmy to Swanny at second slip, in the words of Rachel’s Open Mic Night crowd….FUCK YEAH!!
00.27am: Jimmy traps Twatto LBW, it looks plum but given not out, England choose to use a review and shitty, shonky, Spectrum ZX standard virtualeye says not out, balls.
00.34am: Hussey mis-times one and gives Anderson a slight caught and bowled chance, it is very difficult and he doesn’t hang on.
01.15am: On TMSofa’s recommendation I have checked out Cricket bet live, they are a specialist cricket betting website that really, really don’t rate the England team and give crazy odds on us, I have placed two bets, the next wicket will fall before Australia reach 91 (currently 52/3) and their total score will be under 400, 1st bet is possible, 2nd bet is printing money!
01.26am: Swann is bowling, really need a wicket please Sir (just because it will be great…but also to win my bet!)
01.48am: Not much going on, at 76/3 my bet is still on, only 10 minutes till my first FIFA battle of the 2nd Test, not making early excuses but I’ve been on a bad run recently, we’ll see how that affects me.
01.58am: Watson gets his 50 and knocks my first bet down at the same time, he really is a giant, vain twat!
02.03am: Lunch and Australia are 94/3, a great first session by England on what is basically a strip of tarmac, Hussey and Twatto look quite settled though.
FIFA time, I am paired with Cris281000, we decide to replay Monday’s El Clasico (Barcelona Vs Real Madrid), he gets off to a great start and scores with Ronaldo after only 8 minutes, not sure this is going to be my day, but then Messi twists inside and the defender and scores a brilliant goal, 1-1.
Kaka pops up with a powerful finish to give Madrid the lead only for Messi to equalize again, then on the stroke of half time, Villa scores from a ridiculous angle to give me lead, 3-2 at half time.
It is looking good but then Ronaldo pops up with a great finish and its 3-3, what a game! 5 minutes later Di Maria scores with a header and makes it 4-3, I try hard and eventually get my reward when Villa scores a beauty from long range and its 4-4 at FT.
Extra time happened and blah, blah, blah….and Madrid win 6-4.
Fredi Fudpukka – Cris281000
Barcelona Vs Real Madrid
Messi 12’& 42’ C. Ronaldo 8’, 62’, 96’ and 116’
Villa 45’& 71’ Kaka 36’
Di Maria 66’
02.42am: Swann bowls first after lunch, let’s hope we can repeat the 1st session with a couple of early wickets.
02.47am: Get the fuck in….Twatto tries one square drive too many and KP takes an excellent catch diving low to his left, Australia 96/3.
03.10am: First yawn of the night, I’m ok, just conscious of the fact that tiredness is setting in.
03.23am: Hussey gets to his 50 and is looking very confident, it’s no problem, just get everyone else out and leave him high and dry.
03.36am: I’m yawning a lot now, feel the end could be nigh, I really want to watch but can’t fight it too much.
03.47am: I don’t feel enough has been made about Matt Prior’s beard, it is just so manly, not in a gay way!
04.17am: I seem to have a second wind, and finally Colly has been replaced in the bowling, sometimes he can be a good option with his change of pace, not today, he has been shit.
04.23am: I still have a bit of a headache so have taken a couple of painkillers, that plus tiredness will probably send me to sleep anytime now.
04.31am: Marcus North feathers a tame Finn delivery straight to Beardy Prior and does two things, most importantly, gives away his wicket and Australia are 156/5, but also wins me a bet, North to score less than 31, thank you namesake!
04.42am: Tea, I have made it to tea for the first time these Ashes, Australia are 159/5, there’s nothing for it, I’m having another game of FIFA.
This time I play epsilon974, he picks Real Madrid and I choose (which might be my favourite team to play as) Manchester City, I won’t give a long and involved description of what happened as it wasn’t a massively exciting game, I control the match but the score line doesn’t reflect the play and I scrape a 2-1 win.
Fredi Fudpukka Vs epsilon974
Manchester City Vs Real Madrid
Adebayor 35’ Kaka 80’
05.04am: End of the first over after Tea, I feel quite awake surprisingly.
05.08am: I have just worked out that Faye will be coming through to get herself ready for work in about 2 ½ hours, decision time – shall I stay up or should I get some kip…?
05.13am: Really struggling now, definitely the last entry until tomorrow unless something extraordinary happens.
10.05am: Awake, my morning ritual of checking Sky Sports news is even more fun today when I learn that Australia crumbled to 245 all out, brilliant from the boys, mostly because I had a bet on Australia under 399.5 runs at 2.7 (basically I won my bet)
So let’s hope that the wicket, which all the experts are saying is a run scoring wicket, plays like that and we put some runs on the board from the start, I hope that England get to lunch on about 125/0.
Oh and seeing as you asked, I would put your money (using Cricket bet live) on Strauss and Cook making over their targets and England’s 1st wicket being over as well, basically if England get to 90 without loss….kerching!!
See you tomorrow.
Sleep total for 1st test – 28.5 hours (still quite respectable but remember bad head + painkillers)
Sleep count for 2nd test – 4.5 hours.
Food count for 1st test – 2 Cheese, Ham and Tomato toasties, 2 Ham and tomato ketchup sandwiches,1 Chicken and Mushroom pot Noodle, 2 slices of bread and butter, 2 mallow chocs, 1 WS&V, 1 WC&O, 1 Steak kettle chips (150g), 1 Roysters, 1 crunch corner, Faye’s leftover Cantonese chicken, 4 pints of diet Pepsi, 1 pint of Beck Vier, 1 bottle of diet coke (200ml) and 1 pint of water.
Food count for 2nd test – 1 pint of diet Pepsi.
FIFA record P7 W5 D1 L1 – F19 A12.